I like Halloween. I don’t dress up. I just like it because the kids like it. They like the dressing up and the candy. Hey, I like the candy.
But I’m not a big Halloween fan. So I went looking on the Internet for others’ opinions. Found some great stuff. Read on!
-The only thing we have to fear is fear itself…and spiders. (Me: Yep!)
-On Nov. 1 my diet is 99 percent CANDY! (Me: Yep!)
-Halloween is the only day I can convince others that my children really are monsters.
-Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cackle manically and people back away slowly. (Me: I’ve got to learn to cackle.)
-For Halloween, I’m giving up caffeine. If that doesn’t scare everyone, nothing will. (Me: Yep!)
-A friend told me her neighbors kids look better in masks.
-Happy Halloween to all those I trust not to leave me for dead during a zombie apocalypse.
-For Halloween I’m going to write “That’s Life” on a white T-shirt and hand out lemons.
-Nothing about Halloween scares me. What scares me is when I flush someone else’s toilet and the water keeps rising. (Me: That has happened to me! Eek!)
-Every Halloween I pretend to be the same thing…Not at Home!
-Exercising should be like Trick or Treating. Walk 20 feet, get candy. Walk another 20 feet. Get more Candy. And so on. (Me: Yep!)
-Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. (Me: Oh gross!)
-If door-to-door solicitors wore costumes and came only one night I year I would open the door for them.
-Vampires sleep all day, fly whenever they want free, and can’t see themselves in a mirror. Where do I sign up?
-When one door closes and another door opens…RUN! Your house is haunted!
-Why Halloween is the best holiday: (1) You are not obliged to visit relatives. (2) You don’t have to buy gifts for anyone. (3) People will give you candy for no reason. (4) It is the only day it is acceptable to go out in public dressed like a penguin.
-If zombies chase us, I’m tripping you. Nothing personal.
-Hubby saves all the candy wrappers, then fills them with Brussel sprouts before taking them to work.
-Bought the first bag of Halloween candy on Oct. 1. Now on bag number 29. (Me: Yep!)
-Don’t make me call the flying Monkeys!
-If you are reading this then you are blissfully unaware of what is creeping up behind you.
-My lack of housekeeping skills are finally appreciated on Halloween. (Me: Yep! Yep! And Yep!)
-At this point my blood type is pumpkin spice.
-The most difficult Halloween trick is to get the kids and the candy treats to come out even.
-Candy corn is a vegetable, right?
-Sending everyone sincere wishes that all the good spirits take over the bad spirits, may your Halloween night be full of fun and frolic, and may you get lots and lots of candy, and no stomach ache. Happy Halloween.
